8 Common Challenges for High Achievers
High achievers have so many awesome qualities. On the outside, it can look like they have it all together. When high achievers work hard, it’s common for them to get results. And things that are difficult for others often come easy for high achievers. But there can be downside to all that success. Here are some common challenges that Your stress is just as valid.
Feeling Like You’re Never Enough
There’s always another goal, and each one becomes increasingly more difficult. High achievers often seek challenges and rise to the occasion when presented with a challenge. When you achieve something, the bar is set higher for your next achievement. That means your goalposts are constantly moving. It’s easy to feel like you’re never enough. (For minorities, this effect can be even greater since you already have the unfair expectation that you need to work harder than everyone else in order to be seen as successful.)
2. Oh, the Guilt!
Juggling it all can leave you feeling like you’re always neglecting something, even though you’re achieving so much. Achieving a goal at work can leave you feeling guilty about time with family. And prioritizing relationships can bring on the guilt for not focusing on work. Even though you’re achieving so much, the guilt can feel overwhelming.
3. Hidden Stress
It’s so easy for others to miss the stress you’re under because you function at such a high level. Everyone experiences stress, but yours is easily hidden or overlooked due to your successes.
4. Fear of Failure
When success comes easily, it’s tempting to avoid areas where failure is possible. If you don’t try to reach a goal, there is always the potential that you could. So, sometimes you might avoid challenges where you might not succeed. But, lack of challenges can leave high achievers feeling unfulfilled.
5. It’s Lonely at the Top
There aren’t many people in your position. When other people see your successes, they can’t imagine you have any problems. And, when so many people rely on your, showing vulnerability can be difficult. When you add on the tendency for others to use comparative suffering to judge your (natural and healthy) emotions, it’s no wonder many high achievers feel lonely.
6. Difficulty Saying “No”
High achievers can be poor delegators. After all, if you do a job yourself, you know it’ll be done right. You have a hard time saying “no,” so you end up juggling it all.
7. “I don’t need help.”
Everyone needs support at times. Even if you want to ask for help, it can be difficult find capable others. Just because you can do (or may do a better job at a task), it doesn’t mean you are the best person for a task. Taking on everything yourself can make it difficult for you to prioritize what is important to you, which can build resentment and lead to burn out.
8. Juggling It All
When you’re in the midst of juggling it all, it’s easy to get too busy. You may find it difficult to give attention to the things that matter most. Even though your to do list is so long, it’s important to add on the items that matter most such as attending your daughter’s soccer game, having dinner with your family, being fully present while your son tells you about his day, or talking with your partner about something other than the family schedule.
Your Stress Matters
Even though you have so many awesome things happening in your life, you are allowed to feel stressed about the challenges in your life. Comparative Suffering (from yourself and others ) may even leave you feel guilty for experiencing the natural emotions that come with being a human. But, your stress is just as valid as others’ stress. You deserve empathy and support. Because your stress matters.
